Blog..blogck..block..

Nw am at an important juncture of my life which
will decide whether I would be striding fast in a
red ferrari with a hot chick or singing songs at
traffic signals for a living.Sadly either is not possible
cos huge import duty,both on the ferrari and the chick
(even Sachin couldnt afford to pay it!)
and my excellent singing skills which will shatter
the windows of the cars at the signals.So better pull up
the soiled socks and roll up the unwashed sleeves and get to work.
So not raping the blog for some more days.You have to wait baby!...

JAB WE MET...Why dont they have mental asylums in Bhatinda?!

There are some moments in life when you seriously wish you can become 'aprathyksh' like shaktiman or mayavi and land up somewhere else.There are some moments when you badly want to kick yourself hard in the rear and front so that you turns numb. Times when you wish you had a time machine and just press the fast forward or rewind button.


It all began when I landed up at PVR Saket to watch 'Jab We Met' among the glittery karvachauth couples.When the credits starts
rolling out,you have a full suit"stirred n shaken" Aditya Kashyap(Shahid Kapoor) roaming around dumbstrucken like
a hen in moonlight.And how you wish he stayed that way the whole movie!!.Then there is this Bhatinda"babe"Geet(Kareena Kapoor)who needs a dose
of full bottle fevicol thrice a day to keep her mouth shut.

The story is esentially on the ghisa pita' kahani of boy n gal reluctantly
end up on a road trip and in the process discovers their underlying
feeling for each other.But there are innovative ways of even treating a ghisa pita kahani(Flurry of movies on 'when harry met sally') and this is where jab we met precisely fails.Even when the movie starts you kind of understand when n where is the finishing line.You know tht Kareena's boyfren would be a loser guy,Kareena n Shahid s bound to be the final couple of the movie and worse the movie deserves a pack of saridon in the break rather than popcorns and pepsi.

The only saving grace in the movie are songs with'Aaoge jab tum' taking the cake.

However the movie raises some serious questions in your head that continues to rake up your brain even in sleep.Why arent there any mental asylums in Bhatinda?.Why doesnt punjabis sue the producers who portray them as a bunch of jokers who desperately needs a silencer in the throat?.Why does the Bollywood thinks that corporate tycoons have nothing better to do in life than ending up on a road trip with a mentally dysfunctional female?.Or they have all the time in this world to do stupid things?.(I dont wonder y MBA is the flavour of the season!).Why dont Imtiaz Ali know that there is a difference between madness and 'full of life'?.Or worse difference between madness and 'madness with a method'?.Which stupid dialogue writer came up with the 'stupidiest' phrases like'akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hai'?.That too a ladki who has screwed up her motor nerve ending connecting her tounge to brain? Why people rely on stupid TOI movie ratings?....Worse..why some people still like the movie?

N.B-The 'karvachaut' couple infront of ma seat decided not to spoil their party and disappeared after the interval!

However one of ma frens said festivals like 'karvachaut' is the real reason behind the population explosion of our country and should be banned.What say?!

KE ZARA..ZARA...

BC.... zara...rajinder dhaba....smoke..tea...downloads....BC....
phir BC....south cafe....vodka...chicken...water..blogging..
strings...insomnia...again BC..laptops..electric shock..
room cricket...BC....surf excel...
chaddi...powerpoint...google...gmail...
BC....BC...icecreams...terrace...leching...nostalgia...philo...
ghazals...dim light...mahaul..BC...aunties...bands...hunger
...tabloids..mags...orkut...aur BC....aur BC...zara...angelina jolie
...aur BC....balls..bac to BC...

insanity....

xams 2mrw...

LAPTOPS..ARE THEY REALLY?..

I think i should sue all those who advertise n sell 'laptops' n make a livin on tht compensation...ny lawyer interested?!..pls contact me..!!

bt seriously ,u cant place it on your lap n work continously for even an hour lest the plastic in your underwear melts and flows down...they r friggggin hottt...i have tried a couple of brands n they r all the same...you have to place it on a table or somethin to work continously...but certainly not on your lap...

all the pirates of the silicon valley..please take note of this!...

TRIP..TRP...

Nw again im goin for a trekking camp...this time at mukteshwar...hop it wl b fun....brings bac to my memory the first camp trip i had..at manali,dmas...the excitement ws great...turnd out to be a memorable part of my life...

hop mukteshwar will also add to that!...

BUSY,AHEM!.......

Some days ago one of my frens told me that one's blog represents him/her....and in my case it clearly represented me...lazy bum..you post one blog in a month or so...went on her lamenting...

nw she was the only person perhaps who read my blog besides me...so ter ws this pressure to update the blog....aah..nwadays a blog is also a pain in the ass...!

but i ws seriously busy to even open my weblog url...no,not my college and classes...but ter ws this whole lot of weird insane interests that kept me helluva busy...i ws seriously busy counting t colors of my neighbour's undies hanging in the wire...busy watchin t dhabawala nearby makin the rotis of sweat!(jesus,u wer ryt..)....busy watchin me turn into a nocturnal...busy wd my sadistic dreams tht i didn care to wake up...busy wd orgies(hd only twice!)...busy wtchin porn...busy drinkin cheap vodka...busy gulpin oily paranthas...busy lechin aunties....busy wtchin obscure art films....busy fucking life so hard that it wont dare to fuck me back...

so nw u knw my fren...i have genuine reasons....continue readin my blog!...

QUALITY,BIG BROTHER STYLE!

After having received an honorary doctorate
from Leeds Metropolitan University in the
United Kingdom, Shilpa Shetty received the
'Rajiv Gandhi National Quality Award' at a
grand ceremony to be held on August 12, 2007,
at National Center for the Performing Arts (NCPA), Mumbai.
Joginder Tuteja, IndiaGlitz [Tuesday, August 14, 2007]

New Delhi, Aug 10 : The Bureau of Indian Standards
today denied that Bollywood actor Shilpa Shetty
was being given the Rajiv Gandhi National Quality
award in Mumbai on Sunday, refuting reports
appearing in this regard in the media.

In a statement issued here, BIS Director (Public relations)
H L Kaul said,''it is informed that Rajiv Gandhi
National Quality Award is not being given to
Ms Shilpa Shetty.'' Mr Kaul said the Rajiv Gandhi
National Quality award is given with a view to
encourage Indian industry and service organisations
to enable them to compete effectively in the global market
through strategic planning in quality programmes, drive
Indian products and service to higher levels of quality
to meet the challenges of domestic and International markets.

''It is also intended to recognise achievements of those
organisations which have continually improved the
quality of their products and services thereby setting
an example,''he said
--- UNI

This was an interesting and equally shocking  piece
of news that came across recently.Atleast I was really
shocked!!..if this goes on like this one day will come
where my kids will be learning Shilpa Shetty is the
father/mother of indian space technology!...

Lets see what Rajiv Gandhi National Quality Awards
 is all about...........
Rajiv Gandhi National Quality Award was
instituted by the Bureau of Indian Standards
in 1991, with a view to encouraging Indian
manufacturing and service organizations to
strive for excellence and giving special recognition
to those who are considered to be the leaders of quality
movement in India. This award is intended to generate
interest and involvement of Indian Industry in quality
programmes, drive our products and services to higher
levels of quality and equip our Industry to meet the
challenges of domestic and International markets. 


The award has been designed in line with similar
awards in other developed countries, like
Malcolm Baldrige National Quality Award in
USA, Deming Prize in Japan and European
Quality Award.

Eventually Shilpa Shetty got the  'Rajiv Gandhi
National Quality Award' at a grand ceremony
held at NCPA,Mumbai attended by the high
and mighty.But the two news above clearly
indicates that there was some confusion regarding
the awards.And this is exactly the point!.I also have
serious confusion as to why the award was given to
Shilpa Shetty!.How did she contribute to the quality
movement?I understand that she has a' quality washboard abs'
but i'm sure that isnt what is considered as the 
criteria in  awarding the Rajiv Gandhi Quality Awards.

Rajiv Gandhi National Quality Award was
instituted by the Bureau of Indian Standards
in 1991, with a view to encouraging Indian
manufacturing and service organizations to
strive for excellence and giving special recognition
to those who are considered to be the leaders of quality
movement in India.

How come Shilpa Shetty fall into any
of the qualifying criteria for the award?
Being a moderately successful bollywood
actress(i liked her performance in phir milenge)
or winning a crap reality show filled with morons
(where ideally most of the participants
 should have been in rehab, not only jade) 
doesnt qualify her for the award 
which is considered as the Indian 'Deming Prize'.
I couldnt believe that no one from
from a country of billion people qualified
better for the award.

I have nothing against Shilpa Shetty personally 
and I like any other hot blooded male 
have seen her movies and leched  away
to glory!.But the point is that Shilpa
completely didnt connect with the award.And
I am not blaming Shilpa for this.The award commitee
seriously needs a kick in the rear.  The  news of denial
of the award to Shilpa by  H L Kaul(BIS Director,PR) gives
some idea about the differences among the award
commitee regarding Shilpa.Atleast it reflects that
there were some people out there who knew
their job though they were a minority.

My sincere request to BIS is If you can't give
the award to worthy person then please stop
giving the awards.Its better not to give the awards
if you cant find worthy people even among a population
of a billion.Atleast dont abuse Deming or Rajiv Gandhi!.